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Grief

A book questioned; do you think the sun ever gets tired of rising after it falls?

And I do get that the sun in question is the person who has that big of an impact on someone.

But again, so humane of a question. For someones, some things, that are so arbitrary we do have a lot of faith in the concept of someone writing a fate for us as if we matter. 

Are we not annihilated by thoughts? So extinguishable as creatures yet with such high hopes just to be known. 

Immortality is just your remembrance of whatever legacy you want to leave behind because ultimately death does come. 
As a shroud that takes you in an embrace, to a concept of either some place or as just rested. Gone. Lost. Changed. 

Mourning is how you stay tethered to love still. The grief and the pain belong to those who get left behind. 
Death has no meaning no reason. It is just an is and then was. 
There are no promises of something after, yet we base our life around it. In want of a heaven, we toil. Just to reassure ourselves that past this maybe we'll get better.

Forgetting is not part of grief, time is. But then time also is an enemy. 
Everything in life is a two-faced coin. And that is the basest truth.

I have been trying to come up with a happy ending after death. Basheldy labeling it to - he has met them (other members lost to death). 
And then yes I am left with Hope. A tether I have clung myself to. 
But... 
I tried to write something else for the blog and almost had a breakdown and then settled for this.

This is different and heavy but.. I don't think I would have been able to write anything else.
I am trying to be mentally happy by keeping myself engaged but I am a husk of a self-past, happiness feels selfish, and yeah. Trying.

Till the next one me lovelies. Ta!

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